Wow What a week I'm completely exhausted ...in a positive way. Although, I feel a sense of sadness and I don't really know why. Well maybe I do and I just don't want to acknowledge it. That's possible.
This past Tuesday I started my new job. I'm working with children with Autism, which is something I've always wanted to do. I was really nervous about this new venture, but the people I work with made my first day very pleasurable and enjoyable. To them I have to say thank you I'm sure there are many anxious moments to come, but at least I feel as though I have enormous support behind me.
On Wednesday I was asked to attend a conference in Toronto because, due to extenuating circumstances, a co-worker was unable to attend. Sure The next day I was in Mississauga Prior to this trip, I hadn't visited the Toronto area in about 15 years.
I stayed with my aunt and uncle who live next door to a little school in the Mississauga/Cooksville area. As a child I was always drawn to that school when we visited. Not knowing any children in the area, it was frustratingly tempting to be so close to groups of children and not be able to be a part of them.
Today, this same school holds a special meaning. One that I'm not going to share right now. But someone out there knows why and it's that same person who will know that there was something missing during my trip to Toronto. The feeling never left me during the entire stay. Sadness.
On Saturday afternoon, the conference concluded. I was little bummed about being in Toronto when a favourite artist of mine was in Fredericton playing at the Playhouse. A concert I had a ticket for. I had been looking forward to his acoustic set for months I know the two forms of entertainment cannot compare, but my aunt put a smile on my face when she said she was taking me to a Leafs game
I had only seen one other NHL game in my life and that was in Florida. I hadn't seen the Leafs play live until last night. It was Pink Ribbon Night. How fitting, considering my experience with a certain form of cancer. I made a donation to both the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation and Hockey Fights Cancer and thoroughly enjoyed my first Leaf experience (They lost - and I miss Domi)
Now I'm home again, feeling content with the direction my life is going, but yet still sad. Still something is missing. I shouldn't really complain, its something I feared myself out of having. As my mom always said, "You have no one to blame but yourself."
bumble abominable snowman, bumble + bees + totem, bumble, bumblbees.
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